Lucky Man

Kyle Sandilands is a lucky man.

Sure, most of Australia thinks he's a major-league moron and chauvinist and he has courted plenty of controversy during his TV and radio career, but I consider him to be a lucky man indeed.

Following a recent act of total foolishness late last year in which he hurled derogatory and sexist comments towards a female journalist who criticised his new TV show (or should I say TV train wreck), he was found guilty of seriously breaching decency codes. His radio station, 2DayFM will now be slapped with new licence conditions as implemented by the Australian Communications and Media Authority (ACMA), in which any offensive language, particularly those directed towards women (Kyle's most frequent victims) will be regulated and any further offenses committed by Sandilands can lead to fines and even a termination of 2DayFM's licence.

Ok, now to address the reason why I think Kyle is a lucky man. He's lucky because, despite the fact that he's said and done numerous revolting things while on the air he still has his job. Most of the things he did seriously breached decency codes, most likely breached terms of his employment and he's still allowed to park his ever-widening backside behind a microphone every morning. Oh yeah, and he's the co-host of a breakfast radio show, people. There are likely to be some children who can hear the things he says while listening to the car radio on the way to school. To make matters worse, 2DayFM has already cost its network Austereo millions of dollars' worth of sponsors and, despite still being the top-rated show in New South Wales, is rapidly losing listeners, all thanks to the actions of this moron.

With most other employees in a different field of work, I'm pretty sure that continually making mistakes that breach codes of practice is grounds for dismissal and if you're lucky, you might get a second chance but that's it. But Kyle has made so many gaffes and offended so many people I've lost count. Seriously, haven't any of his bosses heard of the saying, 'fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me'? Well guys, I'm not pressuring you all to give Kyle the old heave-ho right away but it seems that he has fooled you all more times than I can count on one hand.

And even if you look beyond the on-air controversies, Kyle's work ethic is nothing short of abysmal. It's one thing to 'chuck a sickie'. But if you tell your bosses that you're too ill to come to work, don't get caught club-hopping on the SAME NIGHT that you called in sick!!! Oh yeah, and he's 'accidentally' done that more than once. It also doesn't help that he often calls in sick mere minutes before he's due to go on air. Also, please bear in mind that excessive sick leaves arouses people's suspicions, Kyle. I know he suffers from multiple health problems (he's overweight, smokes too much and has a poor diet) but even so, if you call in sick too many times people will start to wonder if you're faking it, especially after you are caught gallivanting around rather than recovering.

Oh yeah, he's also taken vacations without notifying his bosses and his co-host Jackie O, who has in the past expressed irritation over his lax work habits. Yup, sounds like a candidate for employee of the year. No wonder you guys are keeping him around!

Kyle Sandilands, I hope you know how lucky you are. Seriously, in any other field of work, or perhaps in any other radio station, if you've committed the kind of mistakes you made numerous times and displayed the same type of lackadaisical work ethic you would have been out of a job a long time ago.

At the same time, I hope the new conditions that ACMA are planning to impose on your station will convince you to grow up and think before you speak. You got away with it again now but mate, in the future, you might not be so lucky.