Ok, lame jokes aside, yours truly hasn't blogged lately but lo and behold, the gods rewarded me with a couple of news stories that have compelled me to jump straight to the computer and type out another long rant that I like to pass off as blogs.
Both stories feature a couple of blokes - one a rich geezer with a penchant for assaulting his soon-to-be ex-wife and the other a radio sports reporter whose loose lips landed him in hot water following the Wimbledon women's final.
Earlier today, I read a story in the newspaper that British multi-millionaire Charles Saatchi announced to the press that he had made the decision to divorce his wife, celebrity chef Nigella Lawson. The announcement came just four weeks after he made headlines for photographs that showed him having a squabble with his wife at a London restaurant, during which he grabbed her throat several times and even pinched her nose. Lawson would eventually leave the restaurant in tears and after Saatchi received a police caution for assault, Lawson packed her bags and left their home.
Saatchi initially dismissed the allegations against him, calling their argument nothing more than a 'playful tiff' and insisting that he did not apply any pressure on her neck when he grabbed her.
Yet her face clearly looked distressed and she ran off crying. I guess that's why he changed his story admitted that they had been arguing after all.
Want to know the best part? His reason for filing for divorce was that Lawson failed to defend him against the backlash for his actions and that his move was heartbreaking but necessary. To add further insult to injury, Lawson, like the rest of us, heard about his decision via the newspapers.
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| 'Playful tiff' indeed! |
After I had finished reading this story while sitting on the train, I literally slammed the paper onto my lap and mouthed the words 'What the *BLEEEEP*!!???' to myself while shaking my head. Luckily, my fellow commuters didn't notice. It's bad enough that this guy assaulted his wife and made her cry in public, but to then hit her with divorce THROUGH THE MEDIA rather than manning up and confessing to her, and on the grounds that she didn't defend his boorish actions? Wow, what a whiney, self-righteous, extremely arrogant old pig. And a cowardly one at that. I guess all the money in the world can't always buy manners, class, integrity and courage. Well Chuck, if a divorce is what you want, good luck with it, buddy. Because you'll be hard-pressed to find anyone outside of your immediate family who will be on your side and I would not at all be surprised if your lawyer secretly wishes they can beat you across the head for what you've done. Face it, Chuck. A lot of people out there would love to show you what a 'playful tiff' feels like!
Ok, onto idiot number two. This year, French tennis player Marion Bartoli won the Wimbledon women's final. After winning, she gave her father and former coach a hug. John Inverdale, a reporter on BBC radio 5 Live who was covering the event, uttered this memorable piece of commentary to his listeners: 'Do you think Bartoli's dad told her when she was little, 'you're never going to be a looker, you'll never be a Sharapova so you have to be scrappy and fight'?'
Naturally, he and his network were condemned for the stupid remark and the BBC was forced to issue an apology. To her credit, Bartoli shook off the controversy, stating, 'it doesn't matter. Honestly. I am not blonde. That is a fact. Have I dreamt about having a model contract? No, I'm sorry. But have I dreamt about winning Wimbledon? Absolutely. And to share this moment with my dad was amazing.'
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| A real 'looker', isn't he? |
First of all, congratulations to Bartoli for realising her dream and much respect to her for taking that tacky remark on the chin. It is also refreshing to see a tennis player (or should I say athlete) who cares more about honing their craft in their chosen sport and winning the top prize rather than how many modelling contracts, sponsors and twitter followers they can get. That's about as honest and professional as you can get.
It should also be noted that Bartoli has an IQ of 175. I'd imagine that Inverdale's is at least 100 points below that.
As for Inverdale, you are a complete moron and I hope you have learned that there are some things that are best left unsaid, no matter how witty you think they are. As a guy working in the media, you must learn to think before you speak. And for someone who has no problem implying that someone is ugly, you sure made yourself look like a hypocrite.
I'd run and hide if I were you - I am pretty sure that there are many women out there wearing fancy shoes with the intent of driving the sharp heels into the part of the male anatomy that is sacred to guys - if not your head.
And that brings us to the end of this blog. Hopefully these two guys can get past their respective blunders and move on and that the women at the wrong end of said blunders can put it behind them and go on to bigger and better things. Until next time, Bernd wishes you readers nothing but the best. Peace out!
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