Spare me your 'wisdom'

Madonna advising older women to wear age-appropriate clothing. Tiger Woods imploring all married men to be good to their wives. Kim Kardashian urging school children to study hard. You already know what to make of such advice from such people - they are meaningless and downright ridiculous.
Well, you can add to that list Australian mining billionaire Gina Rinehart. During the week she addressed so-called 'jealous people' who speak ill of the rich, advising them to stop drinking, smoking and socialising and work harder instead.
Rinehart was criticised for her comments, with Australian Treasurer Wayne Swan branding the comments an insult to Australian workers and families and Federal Health Minister Tanya Pilbersek suggesting that Rinehart should try surviving on the minimum wage (which Rinehart thinks should be lowered).

I think I speak for all honest working men and women when I say Gina, please spare us your 'wisdom'. Seriously, who are you to dictate how hard people should work when you didn't have to lift a finger to gain all of your riches. All you had to do was be Lang Hancock's daughter and heiress. Not all of us are lucky enough to have rich parents from whom we could inherit a fortune. Not all of us can make a million dollars or more sitting on our backsides twiddling our thumbs (which reminds me, Gina, and no offence, but you seriously need to address the size of yours).

And more importantly, while you do have a point that some people would be better off financially if they stopped spending so much money on booze, drugs, gambling, material goods they don't need and can't afford etc, there are people out there who work hard to provide for their families but are still struggling nonetheless. It's unfortunate but such people do exist - perhaps if you took a walk away from your mansion and out the gates of whatever snobby suburb you live the good life in you'd see and hopefully return home enlightened.  

More importantly, Gina, has it ever occurred to you that when us 'jealous' working people speak ill of your kid we are not doing so out of envy, but rather, out of contempt and derision? Not to sound cruel, but whenever people of your wealth gripe about how hard life's been treating them, we can't help but shake our heads in disbelief, if not laugh out loud. Just as you claim that  we're not working hard enough therefore have no right to complain about life, we argue that every complaint you and your kind make is an affront to people around the country and around the world that are doing it tough just to make ends meet. As far as we're concerned, you've got enough money to feed several small contries so you should have absolutely nothing to bellyache about.
Speaking of which, Gina, did you read that little corker about Employment Minister Bill Shorten moaning about how hard his life is despite the fact that he makes $330,000 a year? Wow, cue the melancholic violin music and someone lend the poor guy 50 dollars, he needs money for a sandwich! What a load of tripe!

So in closing, Gina, you can call working people a bunch of jealous whingers all you want but unless you experience how it feels to worry about paying the bills and supporting your family, I suggest you keep your mouth shut unless you want your name and reputation dragged further through the mud. Just because you're the richest woman in Australia it doesn't give you the right to tell people how to live their lives. Sure, there are people out there who need to stop slacking off but that doesn't apply to all people who are struggling. They're working very hard to put food on the table for their families, something that you're probably not so familiar with.
And please realise that no one is jealous of you. Far from it. Believe it or not, not everyone aspires to have as much money as you do. What would be the point? Sure, you can buy and own more things than the average person can but will all that money really bring you complete happiness and don't you ever become paranoid once in a while that someone might stab you in the back and take it all away?

Oh, and one more thing, and again no offence intended. We may be working hard for our money but at least most of us are on good terms with our families. All the money in the world and you can't even have that.

See? I, an average guy, can be judgemental and insensitive too!

Now, can you spare me a couple of bucks so I can get a train ticket to work in order to earn a wage to pay my next bill?

Another ridiculous case of coddling children

A few blogs ago, I ranted about a school in Victoria and their preposterous rule that prevents students from touching each other. Whether it's a hand shake, high five, friendly hug or inadvertently brushing against a fellow student, physical contact of any kind between students was prohibited.
Well, just when I thought school rules couldn't get any siller, a newspaper article today proved me wrong. A school in Sydney (I'll be nice and keep their identity a secret) has banned its students from doing cartwheels and handstands on the playground unless - get this - they are under direct supervision from a trained gymnastics teacher.
According to the school's website, they consulted with the Education Department and agreed that the ban would prevent playground injuries. Predictably, parents were up in arms over the ban, claiming it is extreme and stops children from having fun during recess and lunchtimes. A parent from the school in focus began a petition demanding for the rule to be overturned and said that she accumulated more than 250 signatures.

These parents have every right to be outraged. Seriously, this is another case of people coddling children too much. At the risk of sounding like an old man, I remember back in my day kids did cartwheels and handstands when handball, the hopscotch, the jump rope, sports and other outside activities became boring (or if they wanted to show off) and not once did I hear reports of a kid seriously hurting themselves. Sure, there may have been a few instances when a kid lost their balance and fell over but the worse that they got out of it was a scrape or a bruise and they usually fell to the ground laughing or blushing out of sheer humiliation while their friends ripped them to shreds for their futile attempt at trying out for the circus. I certainly didn't hear teachers calling for these activities to be banned. They may have told children attempting them to be careful but that's about it.
 
But hey, perhaps something has happened in other schools and the possibility of suffering a bad injury is always there but you know, it doesn't take a trained gymnastics teacher to know when a kid is biting off more than they can chew in terms of performing stunts to impress their friends. Teachers patrol the playground during recess and lunchtime for a reason - to make sure that kids are behaving themselves and are not doing anything dangerous. Again, back in my day, if a teacher saw children fighting or attempting a stunt that could be unsafe, they would march over to the kids and put them in their place - or in terms of the latter, warn them to be careful and then watch over them, ready to intervene if things got out of hand. We certainly didn't need someone like Lauren Mitchell to watch over us.

An interesting point in the article is the inclusion of NSW Primary Principals Association president Jim Cooper's statement that if children had an accident at their school, they would hold the school responsible. Well, isn't that something!? Perhaps schools are putting this rule up not just for the safety of the kids, but primarily to cover their backsides in the event that something bad were to happen? Yeah, I know what you all are going to say - 'Well DUH, Bernd!!!! It's pretty obvious!!!' Yeah yeah, spare me your gloating I reached the same conclusion.  

School principals, please do not insult your students' intelligence with silly rules like this. Kids do push the boundaries at times but for the most part, and unless they were raised by irresponsible parents who couldn't be bothered teaching them the difference between right and wrong, they are well aware of what they can and cannot do. Sure, kids do get into accidents now and then and walk away with bruises, scuffs, cuts and scrapes for their troubles, but that's just a part of being a kid. It's all part of the learning experience that we all go through growing up.

Let kids be kids, people. No need to coddle them too much. 

Geez Louise, There's Nothing To Worry About!!!!!

Arnold Schwarzenegger, currently trying to revive his acting career, revealed in a recent interview that his parents were not very supportive about his training and bodybuilding when he was young.
His father once told him that it was a useless pursuit since he was putting his body through hell purely for vanity reasons and that he was better off using his body for more useful purposes such as chopping wood and shovelling coal.
His mother on the other hand feared that her son had become a homosexual in his teens since he had posters of bodybuilders on his bedroom wall when in fact, he just admired these men and aspired to be like them, if not better.
Well, Arnie would go on to become a decorated bodybuilder, a successful actor and a politician. Quite an achievement. Well done, man!

Anyway, the reason why I brought this up is because to some degree, I can relate to him. No, my parents never questioned my sexuality but there have been times when they were concerned about my training. I will admit, I am a gym junkie and I work out for one and a half hours, five to six days a week - and I push myself pretty hard and believe in the saying 'no pain, no gain'. I'm not as pumped as Schwarzenegger (and I never will be) but modesty aside, I am pretty muscular and don't have much fat on me.
Not bad, huh? But there have been times when I copped it from my parents. Nothing too serious, just a few times where my mother would tell me that I'm getting 'too skinny' and that I need more meat on my bones and my father telling me that I must be anorexic since I don't eat quite like I used to when I was younger.

I don't normally take it too personally but I will admit there are times when I roll my eyes at such remarks. I understand now why they were concerned about the number of hours I played video games when I was a kid but getting worried about me keeping fit? Considering that I've never injured or seriously hurt myself while training hard and that my fitness and strength has allowed me to help them out with some strenuous house and yard work it does boggle my mind a little listening to them telling me to slow down.

But you know, I understand where they're coming from. It's natural for parents to be concerned for their children and well, I do push myself hard while training. I do believe in the saying 'no pain, no gain' and if I wake up one morning without some form of muscle pain, I get mildly disappointed (yeah, I'm a masochist aren't I?). But sometimes I just want to tell them 'Geez Louise, there's nothing to worry about!!!!' Knock on wood, but unless I seriously injure myself during a session or suddenly stop eating period, I don't think anyone should be worried - especially since it's my body.

When idiots show off

You hear many stories of people needlessly injuring themselves or somtimes even killing themselves just because they were trying some new and extremely stupid way to amuse themselves and their friends. Well, you can add Darwin man Alex Bowden to that list.

While entertaining some friends visiting from Queensland at a house party, Mr. Bonehead (oops, I meant Bowden) decided to set off a few firecrackers. Sounds fine, but then he took it a step further and decided to place one on his butt crack. His friend lit the fuse.
Naturally, the outcome was catastrophic for poor Alex. The firecracker burned his buttocks and several fingers on his right hand as he tried to put the darn thing out. He is now in hospital being treated for his humiliating wounds and probably his wrecked ego.
To add insult to injury his friends and his mother thought the whole thing was funny.

With alcohol-fuelled violence in Sydney frequently making news headlines (aside from the London Games, The Dark Knight Massacre and Julia Gillard's latest blunder) it's very easy to forget about the instances of alcohol-fuelled stupidity that still goes on around the country. Bowden himself stated from his hospital bed that he and his friends had a few beers, decided to set off some firecrackers and then he, in his own words, 'put one in my arse'. Did he seriously expect to come out of that stunt unscathed? It goes without saying that shoving explosives up your backside is not a wise thing to do and that the repercussions are disastrous AND embarrassing. Trying to purchase a porno magazine at a local newsagent and then presenting your order to a female cashier is nothing compared to the level of humiliation that such stupid acts like this yields.

To be fair to Mr. Bowden, if trying to entertain his friends and leave them on the floor paralysed with laughter was his goal, well then mission accomplished even if it meant that his friends were laughing AT him rather than laughing WITH him. Which reminds me, someone should tell this guy to re-evaluate the types of people that he considers 'friends'. Friends don't let friends shove explosives up their butt, whether they're drunk or not. What's next? They're going to ask Mr. Bowden to test his tolerance for pain by jumping into an empty swimming pool full of thumb tacks naked, just as Weird Al Yankovic sang in one of his songs? Yech!!!!   

Some people out there would go to great lengths to entertain their friends and well, you have to admire them for that. It's great that they've got that desire to please the people that they love most. But resorting to silly stunts that are potentially harmful and/or deadly is not the way to go. The goal is to have people laughing with you, not at you, and definitely not to have them panicking over your damaged form. Besides, that is one good way to permanently trash your personal image and ego.

It's just not worth it.

Sour Grapes

Ye Shiwen.

Better remember the name, people, because if this 16-year old swimmer's recent Gold medal-winning performance in the women's 400m individual medley during the London Olympics last Saturday night are anything to go by, her name will be popping up in many more Olympic games to come, barring any sudden retirements, loss of form, injuries etc.

She apparently swam a section of her race faster than US swimming stars Ryan Lochte and Michael Phelps (he of the eye-popping eight gold medal haul in the 2008 Beijing Olympics and legendary diet plan). Not only did she break defending champion Stephanie Rice's world record, but she did so more than a second quicker than Rice's previous best.
During the freestyle leg of the race she clocked in at 25.75 seconds - putting Michael Phelps' own freestyle time during his own individual medley race to shame.
Lochte was clearly impressed with the teenager, stating that she had what it took to beat him in a race. Lochte's mentor, US swimming team coach Gregg Troy hailed her performance as 'a heck of a swim'.

Clearly, a star in the pool was born last weekend. But when I read an article on the internet about it, the headline and the last few lines made me roll my eyes. The article was titled Swim Starlet Sets Off Chinese Whispers and towards the article's conclusion was the mention of China's drug-tainted past when it came to swimming.
The writer, Steve Larkin, is from the Australian Associated Press. I hate to point fingers but to me, he seems bitter that Rice (who is Australian) was beaten by a youngster in her pet event. Don't take my word for it, the comments generated by the article were a mixture of support for Shiwen (some users lambasted the article, claiming that it reeked of sour grapes, childish accusations and to some degree, racism) and people who are adamant that Shiwen wasn 'on the juice'. Some readers also slammed the Australian media and public in general, calling them narrow-minded sore losers who try to come up with excuses to justify our athletes' losses and show total disrespect towards winners from other nations.

Me personally, I say congratulations to Ye Shiwen on an impressive, gold medal-worthy performance, even if it came at the expense of my fellow Aussie in Stephanie Rice, and unless something comes out, I am not going to sit here and accuse her of being 'roided up'. Why throw such heinous accusations without any proof to back it up? To his credit, Larkin also mentioned that in the 2010 Asian Games, Shiwen blitzed the same event some two seconds faster than Rice managed in last Saturday's swim so he does recognise the fact that she really is talented, rather than some roid head who can't perform without her precious drugs. Still, the headline of his article and adding in that ugly factoid about Chinese swimmers doesn't let him off the hook that easily.

Yes, it does suck to see your compatriot lose during the Olympics but it's still the early stages, people. There are still plenty of opportunities for your respective nations to strike gold. Even Rice herself vowed to put this loss behind her and move on. Let's do the same, and in the meantime take our hats off to a deserved winner.

Get out there and play - it's that simple!

According to a study by the University of Sydney, up to 70 percent of children from New South Wales are unable to run, throw, catch or kick a ball properly, skills that should have become routine by the time a child has turned seven years old, regardless of their athletic prowess.
Naturally, these shocking facts painted a bleak picture for Australia's future sports stars and indicates that more and more children are going to most likely grow up overweight or obese. Dr. Louise Hardy, who led the report, blamed this on the lack of PE teachers in primary schools and the growing number of parents who can't be bothered kicking a ball around with their kids.

Being a fitness-oriented person, I found this story shocking to say the least. When I was young, just about every kid knew how to throw, catch and kick a ball, whether they were athletes or not. Even the kid who was picked last for team sports mastered those skills. I was quite chubby and unfit when I was young and I had no problem performing skills, though the results were often unimpressive.

I have to disagree, however, with Dr. Hardy's view that the lack of PE teachers in primary schools are one of the key reasons for this development. When I was a kid, and all due respect to my teachers (I wouldn't say I enjoyed school, but I will admit that all but one of my teachers during my primary school years were excellent at what they did), but I wouldn't say that any of them even came close to being a PE teacher. But that said, they had no problems teaching us how to master those basic skills needed to play sports and be active. It doesn't take a 'PE teacher' to show kids how to play ball. If their parents won't teach them then you, teacher, should do it. It's not that hard.

Scientists and health experts have banged on repeatedly about how ancient humans would have beaten us 'modern' people in any physical endeavour based on the differences in levels of activity between the two, and now the same has to be said about children from this generation and from those of generations past. An average kid from ten or twenty years ago would most likely beat an average kid from today in most sports simply because they've learned the basic motor skills needed to run, throw, catch and kick properly. Time to get out and play, kids. Put down whatever it is that is keeping you on the couch and preventing you from becoming the very best you can be physically, pick up a ball, invite some of your friends and family and have a lovely game outside. Who knows? You just might grow up to become Australia's next sporting hero, inspiring other kids to get active.

F is for 'Fail' - and 'Fake'

On March 23 this year, I posted a blog about the impending return of reality TV series Big Brother on Australian TV screens (which will happen some time after the Olympics) and in the blog I also wrote briefly about a then-upcoming reality show called The Shire which, apparently, was supposed to be Australia's answer to the US series Jersey Shore. I wrote that it was likely going to be a train-wreck featuring a bunch of try-hards, idiots and fake personalities, would make viewers question their sanity, would make a laughing stock out of the Sutherland Shire area and would attract critics from all angles.
Interestingly, when comparing Big Brother and The Shire I recommended that viewers go with the latter, simply because Big Brother is always guaranteed to be a virtual repeat (if not a worse version) of the previous season whereas The Shire was something new.

Well, The Shire is currently on the airwaves and just as good ol' Bernd predicted, it was an absolute train-wreck, triggering the kind of wide-ranging backlash that hasn't been seen since Julia Gillard unleashed the Carbon Tax and Kraft released the isnack2.0 (later renamed Cheesybite). I didn't watch it myself but based on what I read in news reports and friends' posts on facebook thank God that I was smart enough not to, all due respect to anyone who did. I read people called the show 'crap', 'rubbish', 'drivel', 'piece of shit' and of course, the oft-used 'The Shite'.
Meanwhile, media outlets and news reports wrote about the show in a mainly negative light. They commented that the show made a mockery of its setting and criticised the cast for their fake, shallow personalities, for portraying negative stereotypes and even some of the girls for their fake body parts. The show's creators were shamed and facebook groups have been set up petitioning for the show's cancellation.

The Sutherland Shire's mayor Carol Provan was especially harsh in her criticism of the show, particularly towards the female characters whom she branded as 'tarts' and even took a shot at the Sydney suburb that two of the show's more notorious cast members originally came from. Speaking of which, as it turns out at least seven of the show's main characters (including over-tanned, surgically-enhanced bimbos Vernessa and Sophie, the show's two most notorious characters) don't even live or work in the Shire area. However, channel 10's programming boss David Mott stated that as long as cast members were willing to 'live, work and play in The Shire' (ie: be a part of the show), then they were ok.
But which ever way you look at it, the show was deemed a massive fail for the Ten network and appalled many, particularly angry and embarrassed locals whose community are still trying to shake off the negative image cast by the 2005 Cronulla Race Riots.

Sophie and Vernessa

Ok, I hate to sound like an insensitive jerk, I can only imagine how many viewers are hurting right now for losing 30 precious minutes that they'll never recover, but to the viewers who are complaining about having their life, time and energy wasted, what the hell did you expect? When TV shows try to imitate another they usually fail (the US version of The Office turned out to be a success so I guess there are exceptions to the rule) and a show that tries to imitate one already known for trashiness and controversy is all but guaranteed to be a prize stinker. You should have known that before you flicked onto channel 10 at 8pm on Monday night.
Yes, it's ok to vent about how bad the show was and how angry you were for watching - I would have done exactly the same if I did, but in the end it was your own fault for getting fooled into watching it in the first place and not having the guts to switch channels or switch off the TV when the show got worse. Just saying.

As for the people lamenting that Australian TV has come to this, keep your chins up. Judging by the criticism that this show is getting, I'd imagine that it will be axed pretty soon, if not only last for one short season. If Yasmin's show can get axed before she could find her groom I'm sure a bunch of fake, shallow try-hards can be given the heave-ho before the party's over.

Well, that's about it. The people of the Sutherland Shire area have something new to be embarrassed about, a bunch of viewers have been left angry and in utter disbelief and God forbid but if this show was to be broadcast in other parts of the world (good God, I hope that hasn't happened yet!) it would make the good people of Australia look like fools.n Well played, creators and channel 10.

For all that, Bernd gives you an F for Fail - and Fake.